Heaviness at times...God at Work in the Mess

Tomorrow will be six years since my dad passed away.  I will never forget the chain of events that played out that night.  From confusing phone calls, to frantic packing, to nervously driving to Myrtle Beach, hoping and praying for the best.  We were about an hour away from the beach when we got the news that dad had left this earth.  I can't believe its been six years, yet at the same time so much has happened in these 6 years that it does feel that long!

Some of the hardest moments for me are seeing my mom sad and lonely in the midst of not having her companion, soulmate there.  I also at times just would like a little conversation with dad just to hear his voice, because at this point its hard to remember that and I don't want to forget.  One of the biggest things that is weighty on my heart a lot is what dad is not able to be a part of on this earth, yet he is with our Lord, I can't imagine! I wish he could hug and kiss (and spoil) little Zoe and see her live life.  Here is what is so great though, is I see so many things in Zoe that remind me of dad, thank you Jesus for that.  I look forward to telling Zoe more and more about "Papa Bob" as well as with our other children. I laugh often thinking of how my dad would interact with Zoe, I would probably be a "nobody" as he took her to do whatever in the world she wanted to do!  Thank you Lord that I can see you at work in the good, the bad, and the ugly.  Thank you that even in the heaviness I can praise You and I trust You.

This pic is from back in May, but my dad loved loved balloons.  At birthdays you usually got a bushel of balloons!  I didn't capture a good picture at Zoe's birthday, but mom did great getting lots of balloons, and then we released a bunch for you dad, so this one is for you too!!